For G

At Midnight
It was when magical things occured

For I found you
and children of a certain kind
smiled their innocence

In November
you pushed me hard
so hard that I fell on my back
and lay there for a while
Hurting while you stood there

I saw your anguish
your poisoned pain

In December
My books lay at my feet and wept
and I along with them

I left your memory far behind then
As I sat at midnight mass
The Church of the Afghans

That Christmas eve
with the stains on the church windows
looking like a kaleidoscope of broken colors

I prayed for you.

I prayed you'de be happy doing the Rumba
if that's what you wanted to do.

In February
I walked over a thousand cottony clouds
barefoot and soul-bared
I walked and skipped and hopped

I wasn't free
not until I came to it
The Bridge of a Thousand Twinkling Lights

In February.
That Bridge called out to me
Walk over, walk over

I could not leave you behind
I could not leave such a beautiful man behind

I looked over the Bridge of a Thousand Twinkling Lights

I could not find you there.

And the lights twinkled and danced
and all your love letters danced down from the skies

and when they hit the ground
they'd roll up with satin ribbons
and go jump jmup into my bag of memories
my yellow bag of memories.

Along with those love letters
those billets-doux
Pieces of my heart came flying

They fused together
into this big, throbbing cushion

Every beat carried your name.

My love had returned to me
Simply.
But
without you.